The richest African-American person of the 20th century has a new offer for fans and non-fans alike, and it’s driving controversy across the country.
Actress, author, host, and philanthropist Oprah Winfrey announced earlier this week that she’d send charitable payments, ranging anywhere from one hundred to one thousand dollars for anyone sending her photos and video of themselves lighting aflame their Donald Trump truck or house flags. The offer was explained as a “celebration of good and patriotic Americans accepting class and destroying hate.”
Executive director of the Winfrey Corporation, Joe Barron, told reporters Thursday that the megastar proudly considers Trump a failure in every way, and encourages the population to eliminate his name and legacy from the face of the earth.
“Oprah believes exactly what that paragraph said up there. She wants the name, likeness, and if possible, stink of Donald Trump completely removed from the planet earth. Burn his obnoxious maga flags, and you get cash, it’s that simple. Miss O gives more money away for causes in a year than most of the South has spent on meth paraphernalia. I think she can be talked into money for smashing signs next, and maybe a nice check for pissing all over America’s biggest mistake’s fake ghost-written shitbooks too. The goal is to make Trump as completely abandoned and forgotten as a condom at a Mar-a-lago whorehouse.”
Winfrey has further promoted her generous offer by making a short film on YouTube entitled : “The Color Orange”. It features a host of African American actors assaulting a Trump look-alike with Twisted Tea cans.
If you’re out of work because of the Trump plague, or suffering from a monetary shortfall because of Republican obstruction of stimulus funds, Oprah might be your best bet for a little relief. So jump up on your couch, pull out your Zippo, and light those rags up for America!