Rittenhouse to LeBron: Apologize and I Won’t Sue

Kyle Rittenhouse has decided to take the high road and end his quarrel with LeBron James. According to our source, Kyle has extended an olive branch and made LeBron a simple offer: Apologize and I won’t sue.

The source, who is a friend of the Rittenhouses, says Kyle has grown weary of all of the negative attention and just wants it over:

“He’s tired of the gifs and memes making fun of hium crying like a baby on the stand. He thinks it makes him seem weak, and we all know that’s not true. Those rifles are kinda heavy, and you have to have a trigger finger in fairly decent condition to perform like that under those circumstances.

“Kyle loves LeBron. He was very disappointed that the superstar is updset with him for killing people. He’s really sad about it. Not the killing people, the LeBron thing.”

We understand, Kyle. LeBron is a huge name, and to have someone that famous call you a little girly Nazi must have hurt. For you to offer to end this with just an apology rather than a court battle over whether a guy has the right to his opinion shows real class.

God bless you, son. And God bless America.

About Flagg Eagleton-Patriot 408 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.