McDonald’s, the fast-food giant, has been offering up celebrity-inspired extra value meals this past year to much fanfare. Travis Scott and most recently J Balvin have gotten the Golden Arches star treatment.
The goal of bringing more young people to come and eat at the fast-food chain has worked and worked well. Infusing hip hop with tasty burgers have brought millions into McDonald’s all over America.
This newest celebrity-inspired meal, however, is guaranteed to cause controversy. McDonald’s has decided to throw its red wig into the political world, offering up a meal inspired and chosen by ex 49ers quarterback, Colin Kaepernick.
The meal will include a new sandwich called the McPlant, apple slices, and a small Sprite soft drink. The fast-food chain hopes this will connect with more health-conscious and political-minded customers and will include a Colin Kaepernick bobblehead with every meal.
Celebrity meals have courted some controversy because it’s only been hip hop stars that have been featured, with most Midwestern people, generally McDonald’s biggest customers, feeling left out and forgotten.
Conservative country music fans feel they’ve been left behind by the fast-food giant because they want a meal inspired by someone like them, except there’s enough 400-pound, toothless inbred looking hillbillies in McDonald’s all across the country.
McDonald’s fan and Midwesterner Clint Herzog and buddy Joe Barron spoke to us about the newest offer from McD’s.
“I ain’t eatin’ that slop!” exclaimed Barron, who said if he wanted to eat healthy, he’d go home and microwave a hot pocket. “We don’t like that Kaepernick fella anyway! He ain’t ‘Merican with all his kneeling and whatnot. Gimme a real ‘merican, like John Wayne or Jesse James!”
They both whined about needing to wear a mask and ordered three double cheeseburgers each and left.
McDonald’s isn’t the only one offering up a Kaepernick food offering. Ben & Jerry’s also has a new ice cream for Kaepernick, but this is a step too far.
There’s nothing more American than diabetes, and Colin Kaepernick’s meal will prevent Americans from getting it. It’s just wrong. It’s time to take our fast food back! God bless America and god bless high blood pressure!!!!