Guliani Quits

NEVER SURRENDER!

A great man once said : “Sometimes, when you’ve fought as hard as you can, and the tide turns against you anyway, it’s time to go home and push someone down a flight of stairs.”  That person was former Fox News host Bill O’Reilly.

Luckily, federal authorities have placed his loofahs in “safe showers” for their own protection.

It’s a good bit of advice for Trump lawyer, crusader, and cousin-husbandry enthusiast Rudy Guliani who turned in his metaphorical gun and badge yesterday, throwing in the towel on the match that had been a losing prospect from the very beginning.  The desperate attempt to throw an election for former President Trump while trying to make it look like it was being thrown against him simultaneously.

Guliani released a statement to Joe Barron of the Washington Daily Queefwhiffer detailing his reasoning and possible future plans.

“I’ve just had enough.  I’m tired, I’m hungry, I’m cranky, and there just aren’t any more ridiculous avenues we can try to go down to pretend Trump won the election.  At this point, my legal reputation is worth less than Judd Nelson’s in ‘From the Hip.’  I’m going to retire with my cousin wife, maybe get a part time job at Arby’s to stay busy.  Who knows.  I’m leaving this whole nightmare of lies and idiotic deceit behind me.  I hope his cult of angry morons will too.”

At this point, Trump and Team Guliani have lost or been forced to abandon over twenty lawsuits or legal actions attempting to prove some sort of verkakta “fraud” minus any evidence whatsoever.  Many believe the disgraced former President and stunt double for “Circus Peanut – The Movie” will continue on with his machinations without his number one trained monkey.  That road will be an even more difficult one.

And that road either leads to Hell or an Olive Garden, and really, what’s the difference.

But that is what Donald Trump does.  HE carries on blabbering absolute irrational nonsense no matter who believes it or how stupid they are.  And he’s used to doing it alone after all these years without an Apprentice.

 

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