The anticipation for the January inauguration of Joe Biden and Kamala Harris as our country’s new President and Vice President has begun to climb during the waning days of outgoing shitloser Donald Trump. The ceremony itself will have a meticulously determined guest list of the highest echelon political figures and world-wide intelligencia.
According to a detail dropped in an interview with The Arlington Queef’s Joe Barron yesterday, that invitiation has been exclusively made to nation of Islam leader and controversial spokesman Reverend Louis Farrakhan. Vice President Harris referred to the 87-year old fundamentalist civil rights figure as : “A spiritual mentor and a great humanitarian.”
“He’s a very important man,” Harris explained while tearing into a medium-rare milksteak. “Has he maybe once or twice said something nice about Hitler? Sure. So has Candace Owens. He may have insulted the Jews from time to time, but so has Trump and he’s fat and white. Sort of. Frankly I just invited him to see how many heads explode on Newsmax.”
Farrakhan has gracefully accepted the invitation, stating that even though Biden is yet another “elderly white devil”, he prefers him to Donald Trump, whom he describes as : “The most racist-ass fat shitball that Satan himself has ever expelled from his brimstone-covered anus, praise Jesus.”
Farrakhan will be seated between former exotic dancer and head of the American Brony Association Lindsey Graham and White House Nosferatu Steven Miller. Former President Donald Trump has already announced that he will not be in attendance at the event due to a massive flare-up of his medical condition, being a little pussy.
In the audience, along with the reverend, liberal luminaries such as Alec Baldwin, Kathy Griffin, and Hogwarts Professor Severus Snape will liven up the expected capacity crowd. T-shirts in the hospitality stations around the arena will start at $40, with Donald Trump Jr. selling Chinese knockoffs out in the parking lot for ten.