Country Music Superstars Are Standing for Trump and Confederacy

Country Stars Unite!

Country music’s biggest superstars are fed up with what they’re seeing out there. They’re tired of seeing the disrespect for our great president Trump and our flag, and they’re not going quietly about it.

They created a supergroup to tell their stories and show support for America. The Rebel Dixies are going to take the country music world by storm, and do it with pride. Southern American pride!

The supergroup, consisting of Toby Keith, Gretchen Wilson, Alan Jackson, and Trace Adkins, is taking their patriotic and pro-Trump message to the masses and not back down one bit. The songs are unmistakably Americana, and unapologetically conservative. Tracks like “Keep America Great” and “Get On That Trump Train” showcase their talents and unwavering love for country and our president.

Country Music exec Sandra Batt is pushing their music to country music radio, knowing that these messages of patriotism will resonate with its audience.

“We know that this music, this message is targeted to the most patriotic people in the nation.”

She adds between sips of Shlitz beer, “we know they’ll buy it up, they’ve never once worried about quality or talent before, so this is a no brainer.”

They’re also not worried about alienating anyone, knowing most intelligent people wouldn’t listen to this crap to begin with. It’s literally mass-produced garbage with simple lyrics and simple song structures to get the trailer park crowd excited.

They know a bunch of rednecks who are more than likely in relationships with close family members and flying rebel flags are pretty much going to be their only listeners. They look forward to hearing these Neanderthals call into talk radio shows parroting the lyrics as if they are their own original thoughts.

For these low IQ backwoods knuckledraggers, this is what they’ve been waiting for. Unlistenable crap with twang vocals telling them that Trump is god and anyone who doesn’t think so is a bunch of commies who hate America.

The CD is expected to sell out at Walmart stores in backwoods towns if the fans don’t get arrested for DUI or that 83 Ford Truck doesn’t break down on the way to pick it up. 

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