Harry and Meghan Moving To U.S : ‘Now That Trump is Gone’


They’re the talk of the royal family : Prince Harry and his wife Meghan Markle, who controversially left behind their status in the  British monarchy to live a more relaxed and comfortable life in Canada.  Still, the eyes of the media still follow them, and they don’t disappoint with some of their antics.

The sterling pair of bangers and mash made headlines again last week, announcing that they’d be moving to the United States this year, in Harry’s own words : “Now that that bloody stupid wanker Trump is finally gone.”  The couple have made no secret of their dislike for America’s most pussyfaced leader.

“Amember before Donald when I was the worstest presimadent? Heh. Hold mah beers.”

Sir Joseph Barron of the House of Queefingwood, a close friend and former lorry driver for the royal family told reporters that the pair were waiting in Canada specifically for Trump to lose the election and fade away before they would live in the United States.

“The two delightful young debutantes are physically sickened by the very thought of Donald Trump having any sort of governance over them.  They’ve quite wished to move to a lovely mansion in California for some time now, but master Harry refused to be a ‘commoner under that great bloody pillock.’

His honored wife, Miss Markle has remarked many times that she finds Mr. Trump : ‘More disgusting than the loo at Buckingham Palace after the Queen has eaten a bean casserole’, and was overjoyed when he lost the election.”

Some political experts believe that the animosity towards the disgraced former Presidential failure comes from a previous visit to Great Britain when Trump attempted to impregnate a bidet and admitted that he thought “Big Ben” was a pornographic movie.

Trump also believed Monty Python hosted the Dating Game.

With that attitude, will America welcome the royal pair, or will they get the cold shoulder from a few million trumptards who can’t face the reality that nobody wants their prize moron to take the country backwards?  It’s a quandary worthy of Sherlock Holmes and Benny Hill combined.

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