Biden Vows to Grant Puerto Rico Statehood

UH OH!

As we were so often reminded by the liberals after a hurricane swept into Puerto Rico a few years ago, the island is an American territory.

This loose affiliation with our country led to indignant howls of offense by the left, criticizing President Trump for ignoring the suffering of the population while posing for comically obnoxious and badly-planned photo ops pitching paper towels to citizens whose very lives had been uprooted.

“You guys would get Bounty if you weren’t all such rapers and bad hombres!”

That’s all going to change, says Presidential candidate Joe Biden.  At a fundraiser this weekend with Kamala Harris and campaign advisor Sandy Batt, Biden stunned a receptive audience in Olde Queefburg, Pennsylvania, with the announcement that he had added full statehood status for Puerto Rico to his official platform.

The move would officially add the Latino haven as the 51st state, and most importantly, grant it representation in the House of Representatives, the Congress, and the Senate.

It’s a pretty safe bet that the winners in that first round of elections will all be Democrats.

So is this just an undercover plan to “stack the House” similar to how the desperate Dems yearn to stack the Supreme Court? Many expert pundits say that it is.

Some have even called it a sneaky way to practice “backdoor amnesty.”  Those particular pundits will almost certainly be called “racists” for even raising the point and be banned on Facebook and Twitter.

Twitter suspended Ted Cruz after complaints from the families of victims of the Zodiac.

We all know that Joe Biden will do or say anything to get elected and socialize our great American country until it’s some sort of monstrous beast that looks like California having gay sex with Venezuela.

Luckily, President Trump’s supporters are ready, willing, and English-speaking.  Mostly.  So maybe “Uncle Joe” should consider that when he talks about letting his “Si se puede” and Ricky Martiny nieces and nephews come prancing across our border playing their accordions.

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