A New Jersey amusement park is getting ready to unveil an Ashli Babbitt themed ride, and conservatives all over the country are getting outraged. Action Park in northern New Jersey is set to open the Ashli Babbitt Climb, a ride of sorts that mimics the January event that made Ashli Babbitt and her unfortunate death a household name. Action Park knows the move is controversial, but as owner Pete Strocker says, “Controversy creates Cash”.
Ashli Babbitt, the American hero who lost her life being portrayed like this is a disgusting act by the liberal left. And of all places to do it, an amusement park, where families and children are spending the day being together. But this, this really takes the cake. Fallis Gunnington, a New Jersey resident who lives near the park was disgusted. “It’s obvious that they know nothing about patriotism” he quipped.
Others were undecided how they felt about the attraction. Harry Helmet, a park employee who sells hot dogs didn’t understand all the fuss. “Look,” he said, “I’m just trying to pay off the repairs on my Mini. I don’t care what they do as long as people buy my wieners.” Madelyn Bowie, who runs the Cream Pie Cafe on the midway just chuckled. “ it’s just a ride, no use in getting uptight about it. How about a pie, I have the best cream pies in New Jersey!” She did, indeed, have a wonderful pie in addition to the famous tossed salads freshly prepared on site.
The Ashli Babbitt Experience is located near the Bukkake Falls Water Ride at the park. It’s going to be a highlighted attraction, complete with a range where people can act as the secret service, attempting to hit the rider with nerf gun bullets as they try to reach the top. Watt A Plonker, who is the ride’s attendant who explained how it works, just laughed uncontrollably as he tried to explain how it all works, saying “I just love this place”.
We spoke with two men who will take buying season passes to the park before it opens. Joe Barron, a coaster enthusiast really wants to try it. “It’s almost patriotic!” he exclaimed, excited for the Ashli Babbitt Experience. “Amusements for potatoriotic Americans!” Benjamin Thompson was also ecstatic, practicing for the ride’s opening day. Flagg Eagleton, who is in charge of admissions, is hoping for good crowds. He just knows that they can’t resist a good time. Norbert Heck declined an interview, just shaking her head and rolling her eyes in disappointment. She knows. Opening day will be announced soon.